But back to Ben, he is letting you know what time of year it is with this knit scarf that he has got draped around himself. Draped, not tied. He is giving you access to the other accents of this look–the powder blue dress shirt and complimentary colored tie–with this drapery. Miss Ben said “What the fuck I look like?? Someone who is going to craft a look like this and not have every facet be on display?? Come on, bitch.” No, you come on bitch!! Come on with that windswept Casablanca ass hairdo bidding us adieu from ev-er-y angle!! So much so that even Ben herself has to clutch her pearls. The drama of it all!! It’s too much for even me to handle, girl.
Fernandez even sought help from a consultant, his friend/drug dealer, Griggs. Griggs described the odor as “definitely noticeable, man” and “holy shit, you need to get your life together. I sell drugs and I’m telling you this. Come on.” The two searched under the couch, in the fridge and through the laundry bin for the source of the tangy, raw, powerful, almost meaty smell to no avail. “I called my landlord to see if, like, this was a thing with other people you know,” Fernandez said “but all he had to say was that my rent was late again. Same old shit. He wasn’t much help.” The two then walked to the nearby Sunoco in order to get some more Febreeze, but all they had was car air fresheners so they figured that would probably work just as well and bought three new car smells. Fernandez then decided to give up for the night saying “I’ll find out exactly what it is tomorrow. It’s getting kind of dark and my lamp in broken, so I’ll look tomorrow when the light is better. It’s not too terrible. I’m pretty sure I’ve been to parties that would LOVE an air freshener made from this shit.”