Things we get to do because we finals week free, losers

By Lord Tyler Sikov and Sarah (Zodiac) Yule

  • Learn grammar 
  • Go to the McDonalds drive thru for a large soda and pay with card because I can
  • Sell heavily printed leggings through our MLM while watching Amazon Prime documentary Lularich
  • Ask local restaurants in my hometown if they take panther funds 
  • Become a Cam Girl 
  • Watch iCarly
  • Start a new cult
    • That’s 9 articles baby!!! 
  • Attend meetings for my old cult
  • Go to a traditional latin mass for the aesthetic
  • Have Hanukkah 2: Electric BoogaJew 
  • Go to my town’s matchmaker and get hitched
    • like the Will Smith movie Hitch
    • Matchmaker matchmaker make me a match
  • Gabagool
  • Pee pee poo poo without having to take my laptop in with me to multitask
  • Cancel my therapy appointment to frolic around the grocery store 
  • Played a bunch of new video games
  • Sent my family on a “vacation”
  • Got screamed at by a very hungry cat at 8am  
  • Do a methema
    • Like an enema, but with meth
  • Romanticize my future with every fast food worker
  • Learn a tiktok dance
  • Finally start working on that manifesto I’ve been putting off
  • Tried doing ‘it’ with my pasta maker 
  • Left my girlfriend on read for 45 minutes
    • I’m back on the market Ladies (and fellas, shh ;) ) 
  • Take my vitamins
  • Ate brownies with my aunt and uncle 
  • Teach my cats to play Dungeons and Dragons 
  • Go to Denny’s and get one mug of coffee and sit there for hours as if I have just buried a body 
  • Stole the Declaration of Independence
  • Crashed the currency of a small country 
  • Cast: Summon Tomato as many times as I could before I passed out 
  • Cast: Summon Tornado as many times as I could before I passed out 
  • Spill the Tea
  • Spill some tea
  • Tea some spill
  • Stir shit up 
  • Watch Sharkboy and Lava Girl 3D the way it was meant to be watched

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